25 Tips for Romance

by Sally R. Connolly, LMFT and John E. Turner, LMFT



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Tips to Bring Romance Back to Your Relationship

1.  Romance can be rekindled by recreating your first date. Try to remember where you went, what you did, what you wore, what you ate, what you talked about. Re-create the date as closely as you can.
  2.  Put candy kisses in your sweetheart’s pockets, car, at the kitchen table, and leave a picture with a heart next to them.

3.  Surprise is a wonderful way to bring back romance. Think of something that your partner really wants or would like to do … and get it or plan it.

4.  Find something playful to do … swing on a swing set, play miniature golf, have a pillow fight, bring home the ingredients for “some mores” …

5.  A simple tip for romance is to leave love notes in unexpected places.

6.  Have dinner alone, with candlelight and using the best china and silver.

7.  Come up with 25 reasons why you love your partner and write them out in a card or out put them on small slips of paper in a box for him to open.

8.   Another tip for romance is to look clearly into your partner’s eyes for a few seconds and, while holding that gaze, tell her how much you love her.

9.    Find pet names for each other that express endearment and caring.

10.  Give her flowers on each of your children’s birthdays.

11.  Reminiscing about how you fell in love can bring back feelings of romance. What were the first signals to you that this was a different relationship? When did you first notice that you were in love and when did you first say it out loud? What were some of the earliest things about your partner that you noticed and led to the feelings of love?

12.  Another tip for romance:  Listen to songs that were popular when you fell in love? Choose a song that is “your” song.

13.  Celebrate the anniversary of your first date … every month.

14.  Write in a journal on a regular basis with highlights of your life together. Read it together on your anniversary.

15.  Watch a romantic old movie together like .. Casablanca, Marty, An Affair to Remember or Doctor Zhivago.

Ten More Tips for Romance

16.  Take a bubble bath together.

17.  Pack a picnic and find a spot where there are no other people around.

18.  If you have young children and cannot get away easily, plan a special time after they are in bed. Light candles, put on music, fix something interesting to eat and drink. Think of two or three items of conversation that might reveal more to you about your partner like “What was your favorite thing to do as a child? Tell me all of the reasons you liked it.” or “What is your biggest dream, realistic or not?”

19.  Talk about a couple, real or on the screen, that you really like and think of their relationship as very romantic. Talk about all of the reasons that make you think that. Is there anything that they do/have done that you could do?

20.  Tell your partner 5 things that you love and appreciate about him. Give him all of the reasons that make you say that. Share one example of a time when she/he showed that quality.

21.  To rekindle romance, read love poems together.

22.  Go on a date and pretend to just meet. You might even think of a different persona to pretend to be. Try out some “schmaltzy” pick-up lines with each other.

23.  Volunteer a back rub or massage.

24.  Make random phone calls, texts or e-mails with the only goal of saying “I love you.

25.  For men … offer to help with the housework or the children. Research shows that men who help with housework and child care describe better sex lives.

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